Am I in an alternate universe?

Seriously. Run by 14 year-old girls. The second headline on ESPN.com this morning is "Brady calls out Burress." A story from two days ago. In which Brady jokingly had fun with Burress's 23-17 prediction. Called out? Isn't the Super Bowl a) big enough that we don't need to attempt to stretch to inject fake drama, and b) already so significantly less about football than a normal matchup that we might want to actually focus on actual football, not the soap opera bullshit?

Despite having just kind of acquired Johan Santana, the Mets have to prove themselves on the field. Insightful, hmmm, yes. George Vecsey knows it's his responsibility to remind everyone that whatever hope Mets fans feel right now, they lost last year and might lose this year. Well done sir. (New York Times)

More nauseating fluffy bunny crap from Plaschke, meant to be read while listening to the music from the end of We Are Marshall. Some of it is about football. (Los Angeles Times)

Barry Bonds' locker at Pac Bell might be taken over by the Giants' equipment guy. Apparently there is some significant meaning here, but I don't know what it is. (San Francisco Chronicle)