We're assigning random positions now

Foxsports.com's Dayn Perry, who I think we can reasonably assume gets paid for what he does, has released his 'worst players at each position' list. It might be a worst starter at every position list, I think. Maybe. None of it really matters when you recognize Dayn Perry is an assclown who doesn't actually watch baseball.

3B - Rich Aurillia, Giants

Yes, Aurilia, at 36, is currently atop the Giants' pile — and it is (emphasis his) a pile — at third base. Last season, Aurilia managed an OBP of barely better than .300, and since he's very much in his decline phase, there's no reason to expect improvement. These days, his bat won't play anywhere, particularly at a power position like third base.

Rich Aurillia played exactly 22 of 162 games at third base in 2007. 55 at first base. 99 games played total. Rich Aurillia is not (emphasis mine, bitch) an everyday third baseman anymore, nor is he an everyday player in general, nor is he in line to be the Giants' starting third baseman this season.

SS — Omar Vizquel, Giants

Seriously, props to the Giants, without whom this column might not have been possible. Anyhow, Vizquel has a credible Hall of Fame case, but at this stage he has no business being a regular at the highest level. Defensively, he still makes the routine plays and the occasional highlight grab, but his range is now well below average. His offense is even worse than that. Vizquel will be 41 years old not long after Opening Day, so it's probably time to consider making graceful exit. On a broader level, it's challenging to impart just how bad the San Francisco offense is going to be in 2008.

"His range is now well below average."

In 2007, Omar Vizquel's Range Factor per 9 innings was 4.74, while the league average was 4.44. FP .986, FRAR 30, and rate of 108. He had an awful year offensively, with an OBP of .306, Slg. 315, and an OPS+ of 62. That's pretty crummy, but last year was a huge departure from 2006, which was remarkably similar to the rest of his career when no one really complained about Vizquel's offense. No one knows if 2008 will see the 2007 or 2006 Vizquel, so shut the hell up for now. One bad offensive year augmented by made-up defensive assumptions/assclown lingo doesn't get him on a 'worst' list.*

LF — Juan Pierre, Dodgers

Juan Pierre will compete with Matt Kemp and Andre Ethier for playing time, which will probably mean none of them are everyday players. Pierre is not a very good baseball player when compared to other major league starters, but it's stupid to call him the worst left fielder in baseball unless you call this a worst starters list, which it might be. Or might not be.


*I don't know that much about statistical fielding analysis, but after a very quick exploration of the BP site, one can tell that Vizquel is no where near below average defensively.