Not only is he big and nonathletic, but he's a conspiracy theorist to boot! According to SI.com, the Spencer Hawes Mental Experience goes something like this:
Spencer Hawes is a hardcore conservative from, of all places, the liberal stronghold of Seattle. He was drafted into a city (Sacramento) where one of the country's most recognizable Republican governors (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is in office. Hawes says he "loves" Arnold, and that he brought True Lies with him on the trip to New York, with plans to watch it on the flight home. "Now it has a little extra meaning for me," Hawes said.
Before we expect some kind of right-wing, basketball-and-politics partnership to form, though, Hawes might need to change his stance on global warming. Schwarzenegger, who most recently discussed the issue with world leaders during a tour of Europe, has become a leading figure in the fight for action against climate change. Hawes has a different view.
When I spoke with Hawes at the league's predraft camp on May 31, he talked about a recent Public Debate class exercise at the University of Washington. In it, he said, he denied the entire existence -- and human cause -- of global warming. When asked for his take on Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth, Hawes said, "It's one big lie. I talked about that in my opening speech -- it's the media's liberal overexaggeration of just about everything."
Hawes, also an avid listener of The Rush Limbaugh Show, will be happy to know that Rush also turned pro -- as a talk radio host -- in Sacramento. For fear of overexaggerating any additional draft tales, we'll leave you with that.
Aside from the mountain of scientific data suggesting the environment has been harmed by the planet's warming over the last 200 years (which has accelerated since the Industrial Revolution) I guess global warming could be one big lie. I mean, I suppose Steven Spielberg could have CGI'd a mock-melting of the polar ice cap in Hollywood and sent it to National Geographic and Discovery Channel in a devious attempt to fool the public. For what exact purpose? Spite, I'm guessing. But that sounds like a theory created by somebody who religiously listens to Rush Limbaugh. Wait...

Spencer's practice jersey
Seriously, Hawes is a friggin' idiot. There's no way around it. I don't mind that he's a Republican, but I do mind the whole, "The media's liberal overexaggeration of just about everything," stance. It's weeeeeeeak, Spencer. Weak.
You know what was overexaggerated by the liberal media, Spencer? Your upside and status as an NBA-prospect. Because, like Todd Fuller and Robert Swift before you, unathletic centers don't have any upside. But I guess you aren't too disappointed that they exaggerated that, are you?