Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Randomness

by SonDog

--- Ron Artest on why he chose #93: "The shape of the numbers represent infinite intensity." Um, okay. Ron, let me make one thing crystal clear. You scare the hell out of me. I wish I was kidding, but I'm not. In the immortal words of Wes Mantooth, "Ron, I hate you with everything in my soul. But god damnit do I respect you... Today, we spell redemption, R.O.N." (Note... if you click on that video, the most fitting statement by Mike Breen is the, "Ron Artest has a look in his eye that is very scary right now.")

On that note, I'm half tempted (as opposed to fully tempted, I suppose) to drive to Salt Lake City on Friday night (it's only 5 hours away) to see the Kings play the Jazz, simply because I want to see what Artest and Bonzi Wells are capable of in the city of Salt Lake. Honestly, anything is possible with these two. However, as OZ pointed out to me this morning when I mentioned the idea to him: "Heck ya! Other than being a worthless husband and abandoning your pregnant wife, that's a great idea!" Point for OZ. My prediction is that if I run this idea past Lese, she will respond with, "Wait... You're gonna do what?" So, I think the only trip I'll be making on Friday is from my bar to my couch.

--- Here's a video of a young Steve Atwater, deciding that it was "Punishment Time." This pee-wee version of the hard-hitting safety was quoted as saying, "Bitch stole my twinkie."

--- This could be the only work-out video in the world that would... you know what, I don't even have the words. $20 says the director/camera man said, "CUT! Carmen, we need you to do that again, but this time try and brush your breasts with your hands a little more, and put some STANK on that SPANK!" 2 minutes later -- "CUT! You know, I'm just not feeling this. Why don't we try this one over again. And gals, lose the shoes this time, okay? C'mon, act like you mean it!"

--- President Bush, drunk again.

--- And for you dog lovers who aren't fans of basketball, slap a purple #93 jersey on this pooch and you basically have Ron Artest.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

That kid was awesome! You know his dad was talking crap to everybody.

DMo said...

Okay, the kid was cool, the dog crazy and the bush video funny. But for me it's all about Carmen. It's 8:52 in the morning and while I sip my coffee I'm watching that. Other than the fact I'll be obsessed with breasts all day, I really enjoyed it.

You have to give it to her for a great idea. Stripper aerobics, C'mon, that's awesome! Just think of how many doomed relationships she has prolonged due to heightened arousal. Unfortunately the video will ultimately make it into the hands of the curious male which sparks the beginning of the end. Well, at least a trip to the strip club.

Sonny, as for your observations, maybe you should begin to focus on directing. Her ass slap was quite weak. You either pat or slap. None of this in between bull shit. Put in some extra snap for the clap baby!

Oh Son, if you go to Utah to see the lowly Kings at the expense of my closet, your wife won't have a chance to kill you.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, not going to Utah. I was seriously considering it, but it's not happening. I'll be there on Saturday to help your ass put up shelves. Fortunately, I only charge $37.99 per hour, so I'm looking forward to it.

I agree with the slap. There needs to be a little more oomph behind that. I was disappointed with the weak pat.

DMo said...

Sweeeeeet. Shelves and curtains are the cornerstone of every 27yr old bachelor.

$37.99 huh? Fortunately I know you'll whore yourself out for an open bottle of Jamison. Just make sure you bring your latter and stud finder, (no, not your wife). We'll do the 15ft tall window at the end so our balance is good.

Anonymous said...

Jamo? I'm already at your house. Where are you?

Considering that your tool collection consists of a butter knife and a roll of dental floss, I'll just plan on bringing a full collection of tools for this project. I.e., power drill, stud finder (Lese), laDDer (not latter, dude. Is that a distant relative to a latte?)

Are you getting the curtians from Home Depot? I may have to make that trip with you. Ever since I got my Home Depot card, I can't stay away from that place.

DMo said...

Yep, by the time I'm done my place will be an advertisment for Home Depot. When I open my wallet, it to flashes the bright orange signal call for wood and tools. I figure I can take my flask tomorrow after work and do some real shopping. At least do some "Ah, look at that there mmm hmm, yep, dat-ad-ere-1-b-big-strong-good. Mmm hmmm. that'll do the trick." All with a very serious and intent look on my face while both of my thumbs pull down slightly on the front of my jeans. Good time, good times.

Oh, and I do have a power drill thank you very much. And it is quite large. Though I haven't used it in a while, so I'm not sure how much juice it has.

Anonymous said...

I'm still bringing mine, just in case. And what's the deal with your roommate? Is he going to be able to help with the curtians?

DMo said...

I don't know, haven't talked to him. I'm not sure I'm big on the whole roomate idea. I hope he isn't planning on being around that day, or night, or weekend in general. That's it, he's gotta go.