Sunday, March 23, 2008

Pageturd and Juan Pierre's dirty balls

Ahhh, there you go, all clean.

There's defiance in the house.

"If people really think the reason we lost last year was because my arm wasn't strong enough, or because I didn't get on base enough, hey, that's cool, I'll be the man, I'll take it," says Pierre.

Well, no one really thinks Pierre was the sole reason the Dodgers lost last year, but he  was a pretty significant contributor.  He OBP'd .331, which is not too hot for a major league leadoff hitter.  He wasn't really on base for the guys behind him all that often.

And complaining about getting shit from fans, then saying you'll be the man about it, isn't really being the man about it.

Fans don't appreciate him. Statisticians can't calculate him. Bloggers downright brutalize him.

Fans don't think he helps the team.  The statistics support the idea that he doesn't help the team.  And the overarching gelatinous blob of a whole that is "bloggers" don't like him.  Pageturd, you're borderline Peter Griffin retarded.  That you're even writing a column taking an admittedly counter-intuitive view against an admittedly accepted universal view of Juan Pierre sort of kind of totally demonstrates you know the deal here.  

Now that the Dodgers have added Rafael Furcal's health and Andruw Jones' pop, I think Juan Pierre's presence at the top of the lineup will be as oversized as his cap.  

Guh.  The Dodgers went after Jones because, in part, Pierre is a shitty centerfielder and borderline shitty baseball player.  Pierre is going to be the Dodgers' starting LF, taking time away from a much better player.  Is Pierre going to be on-base more for the Dodgers because Furcal and Jones are in the lineup?  Doubtful.

Pierre adds an irreplaceable speed component to the top of the Dodgers order.
And, in left field, what Pierre lacks in arm, he can overcome with that speed.

One has to be on base for his speed to matter.  I'm not sure if Pageturd is saying Pierre's crappy defense is made up for by his speed on the basepaths, or if his crappy arm is made up for because he's fast in the outfield.  Either way, I'm confused.

Pierre also brings something that, during last season's doldrums, everyone seemed to forget.

You can find it in a locked box in his Fort Lauderdale home.

He's one of only three Dodgers with a World Series ring.




No one can ever question anything about anyone who's ever been on a team that won the World Series.  

You know who else has a WS ring?  

Doug Mirabelli.  

He has two?  Deify him Pageturd.     

I don't want him as the starting catcher for the 2008 San Francisco Giants.

This was also the first time Pierre had been criticized for his arm.

Wrong.  He's been criticized for his noodle for a long time.

"I've had the same arm my whole life and I'd never been criticized like this," he says. "I couldn't understand it. It's never been an issue before."

Yes, it has.

Placing Pierre's weak arm under the spotlight -- and, in fact, putting his whole game at risk -- was the injury to Furcal.

The Dodgers shortstop couldn't reach many shallow center-field balls that shortstops usually reach. He also couldn't move Pierre along the bases as a good No. 2 hitter should do.

Two things.  1)Pierre has to be on base to be moved along.  Plus, your unique-ish Pageturd premise is that Pierre's speed should provide advantages for the whole team, especially those hitting behind him.  So shouldn't Furcal's failings been lessened by the mythical Pierre speed?  2)What the fuck does Pierre's weak arm have to do with Furcal and getting to shallow centerfield balls?

Without a rangy shortstop, Pierre was playing a center field that was twice as big. Without a productive No. 2 hitter, Pierre was a sports car stuck on a pot-holed road.

But he's fast, right?

By the end of the season, he was listed as a Ned Colletti mistake the size of Jason Schmidt.

It was pretty universally accepted Pierre's contract was a mistake prior to the 2007 season.  

By the end the season, he was also gone. He flew home to Fort Lauderdale, and was the only regular not to spend one winter moment in Los Angeles.

He said he wasn't avoiding the fans, he was staying away from the uncertainty.

"I just didn't know the situation out here, I didn't know where I fit in, it was easier to get my work done and stay out of it," he says.

But  he'll "be the man."  He'll "take it."  Right?

The situation is, he's nothing like the Jason Schmidt mistake.

The truth is, the idea of Juan Pierre was a good one, and still is.

That's two Schmidt mistake references.  It's hard to compare a guy who just totally sucked with a multiple-times All-Star and Cy Young contender who was injured throughout the year.  

The truth is, the idea of Juan Pierre being a good MLB player, is just an idea.  

Not reality.  

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