Tuesday, April 03, 2007

YDB Award: Premature Eja... Celebration

by SonDog

There were many nominees for this week's You Dumb Bastard award. There were so many, in fact, that I was actually up for the award. Why, you ask? Because I am supposed to be in Europe right now... but I'm not... because I lost my fucking passport.

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

That's right, I'm a dumb bastard.

That being said, this week's award goes to the Washington Wizards' Michael Ruffin. For those of you who don't know Michael Ruffin, he's a seldom-used big man who spends most of his time buried on the Wiz's bench, trying to avoid the collateral damage from the daily fights between Brendan Heywood and Etan Thomas. He also tries, unsuccessfully, to not look like a freak-show attraction.

Hi, I'm Michael Ruffin. I'm a relative of Willie McGee and Calvin Booth. And I'm a Dumb Bastard.

Ruffin wins this week's award because of his premature celebration attempt in last week's game against the Toronto Raptors. With the Wiz up by three with two seconds left, Ruffin... well, just watch this clip...

On a side note, I think that spastic announcer for Toronto said, "Onions! Baby, Onions!" at one point. Which begs the question, "Um, what?"

At any rate, that clip is one of the many reasons that Michael Ruffin spends most of his time buried on the Wizards' bench. It's worth noting that these two teams are battling for playoff position and that Toronto WON this game in overtime. I heard that Gilbert Arenas was quoted as saying, "I want Michael Ruffin dead. Seriously, somebody murder him. I'll pay you to do it." But maybe I just made that up. Why he was in the game in the closing minutes is a question that only Washington coach Eddie Jordan can answer.

So, cheers to you, scary-looking Michael Ruffin. Cheers, You Dumb Bastard.


the butler said...

Is it just me...or does Ruffin look exactly like this guy?

SonDog said...

Arsenio Hall! What the hell ever happened to him anyway? The two do bare an uncanny resemblance.

OZ said...

How would like to walk into practice the next day. "Hey guys, everyone have a good night?"

I think NBA 2K8 should add the "throw the ball slightly in the air" skill to him only.